Midnight Top Five - The "Black Action Heroes (or, Blacktion Heroes) Who Deserve More Love" Edition

It's been a long time since I (rock and) rolled out a new Midnight Top Five.  But today I was thinking about some stuff, and - lo and behold - a list popped out of my brain.  Maybe it's because it's Black History Month, maybe it's because a certain film's theme song is permanently implanted in the brain of everyone who's ever heard it (you'll know who I'm talking about), or maybe it's just because this wasn't one of the days when I think about nacho cheese.  The point is it's happening.

Black action heroes (and I absolutely hate classifying people, even as "black" or "white", but for the purpose of this list I'm just gonna say black and apologize to myself and anyone who might be offended now) are pretty few and far between.  And while past decades - especially the '70s and partially the '80s - were full of excellent black actors in excellent roles in excellent films, when you go to Google and look for "black action heroes" you're gonna find boring lists with names like Halle Berry and Will Smith and maybe even Michael Clarke Duncan as an ape in Tim Burton's awful Planet of the Apes film.  Seriously, I saw that on a list of great black action heroes.  And I cried.

Is my list gonna blow the rook off the mothersucker? No, probably not.  But it ain't gonna be that boring.  So let's hit it.

Richard Roundtree - Shaft 

(1971, Dir. by Gordon Parks.)

I know what you're thinking.  Here I am, a dude saying these are blacktion heroes that need more love, and I'm starting with the most famous blaxploitation movie ever; the film that is widely believed to have started it all.  But hear me out on this one.

Shaft came out more than 40 years ago.  It was 1971, and it's still known as the year when Hollywood embraced violence.  Films like The French Connection, Dirty Harry and (to a lesser extent) Straw Dogs, took Hollywood heroes and let them carry guns, shoot the bad guys, and bend the rules of the law as they see fit.  And so did Shaft, the African-American companion to these stars.  

And here's what makes me mad.  Each of the films listed above have had countless releases on DVD and now are all on blu-ray disc, ready for consumption by the modern masses.  But what about Shaft?  Shaft was released on DVD in June of 2000 - because the remake was due in theaters that summer, no doubt - and (aside from two pan-and-scan combo packs with its sequels) it doesn't appear anything's been done to preserve this monumental film since.  Is that OK with you? Well it's not OK with me.  I want my Shaft blu-ray with bonus features NOW.  Heck, there's no reason Warner Brothers couldn't have given this one of their awesome 2-Disc Special Editions years ago.  But, for whatever reason, Shaft and Roundtree get no love from the company behind them.  Is The Man keeping them down? I cry foul.

Fred Williamson - Bucktown

(1975, Dir. by Arthur Marks.)

Fred "The Hammer" Williamson is also not an unknown quantity - his later work in films like From Dusk Till Dawn has certainly helped his star - but a lot of his films from the 1970s have kinda disappeared from the eyes of cinephiles.  

One such film is Bucktown, a simple tale of crime and corruption that puts The Hammer in the middle of a feud with an old friend over "territory" in the title town.  The film's got some neat little turns - the battle changes from Hammer against corrupt cops to Hammer against his oldest friend (played well by Thalmus Rasulala) and a bunch of thugs.  Hammer gets the chance to use all of his trademark skills - from his furious fists to his grinning smile - here, and the result is a film that needs to be seen by a lot more people. (Plus, Pam Grier's in it.  And we all love Pam Grier.  It's science.)

Tamara Dobson - Cleopatra Jones

(1973, Dir. by Jack Starrett.)

Speaking of Pam Grier, she's not the only bad lady who used to get down in the '70s.  In fact, many refer to Cleopatra Jones as the blueprint for female blaxploitation cinema.  It's an uneven film, but what Dobson brings to the screen is a unique presence and a style that's all her own - it's truly one of those things that you can look at and say "Wow, only in the '70s...."

Cleopatra Jones' journey through her film builds to a showdown with an angry Shelley Winters, which is really all you need to know about why you should give the movie a spin.  But Dobson's work can't be discounted, and now that I know that Cleopatra Jones and the Casino of Gold exists (Seriously, why didn't anyone tell me this?!?!) I'm excited to see what else the lady could do as this iconic femme.

Bill Duke - Commando/Predator

(1985/1987, Dir. by Mark L. Lester/John McTiernan.)

If you needed a heavy in the mid '80s and Schwarzenegger was your lead, you called Bill Duke.  And I love that about you.  

A man who's stayed busier as a director than an actor, Duke's roles in these Schwarzenegger epics allowed him to snarl like no one else ever had. He's crazy intense, yet at the same time he's kind of subdued.  He can go toe to toe with Arnold - don't act like that one-on-one battle in Commando isn't amazing - and the Predator, all while delivering manic monologues about his dead friend and chasing down a pig with a knife.  The point is that Bill Duke always makes me smile, and we don't talk about Bill Duke's baddassness enough.

Carl Weathers - Action Jackson

(1988, Dir. by Craig R. Baxley.)

Yeah, y'all know Carl Weathers too.  He was Apollo, he spoofed himself on Arrested Development, he even did this amazingly weird yet completely captivating sense of nonsensical ads that you absolutely can't not watch.  Seriously. Click on that link and behold.  I'll wait here.  Go.  I'm not typing any more until you watch them.  Go now.

......

OK.  Action Jackson.  People hate on Action Jackson, which basically killed Weathers' chances to be a major leading man in an era when he could have taken a place alongside his past co-stars.  But it's not as bad as people make it out to be.  It's got an evil Craig T. Nelson, it's got a young Sharon Stone, and it's got half the cast of Predator (Bill Duke's here too!).  But - most importantly - it's got Weathers chasing down a car on foot and then doing a flip over it.  And that means something.  I adore Weathers, and it friggin' kills me that he didn't get to lead more action movies.  

(Oh, and this one needs a new DVD too!  Pan & Scan is it? Eff you Warner Brothers. Give us a better Cleopatra Jones disc too.  Prove you're not racist.)

-------------------------------------

As you can see, I don't have to dig too deep to find black action heroes who deserve more than they've been given.  And if you're looking for some actiony goodness, you can't go wrong with these folks.  Not because of their race - because they're fantastic at what they do.  Which matters a lot more than skin color.

Plus they can leap over cars.

FMWL Indie Spotlight - El Monstro Del Mar

(2010, Dir. by Stuart Simpson.)

If you think a movie with a poster like the one on the left - utilizing phrases like "dangerous vixens" and "ancient evil" and "blood bath" and a picture of a smoking punk gal on the hood of a car and Grindhouse-esque cast photos - sounds like fun, you'll probably have fun with El Monstro Del Mar. 

Three ladies who enjoy tattoos, small outfits, and killing make their way to a relatively secluded spot on the Australian coast, where their attempts to relax and have fun are abruptly interrupted by a series of harsh warnings from an old man and, eventually, a terror from the sea.  These bad-to-the-bone women do not back away from a challenge, and - along with a prim and proper local teenager who they aim to corrupt - they end up fighting for survival against a tentacled monstro.

And that's really about it. I could try to dig into subplots about the characters' sexualities and the relationship between 17 year old Hannah and the three buxom bastardettes, but to do so would miss the point of the quick little film by director Stuart Simpson.  Yes, there's an obvious commentary about these three women, who spend the first two acts partying, drinking, and snorting after offing two men in the stylish opening scene. That opening is a really cool sequence that goes from black-and-white - surely meant to invoke memories of beach party films of the 1950s - to color as the violence begins.  The plot and dialogue similarities to classic horror/sci-fi end pretty quickly (I can't remember any swamp creature movies of that era in which characters were called homosexual slurs or had as many tattoos as a modern NBA team), but the tone of the film stays in tune with horror films of the past. 

The film continues to be slightly derivative in the scenes when the monster does show up, which are reminiscent of the gore you'd see in low budget films of the early '80s. The creature work is very raw but it's effective and makes for a pretty manic finale.  Fans of films like the ones Roger Corman produced at that time - Humanoids from the Deep is the easy comparison - will feel right at home with this creature, which mixes low-budget practical effects with what appears to be a touch of CGI.  The effects are probably the best the budget could manage, and there's at least one gory moment late in the film - you'll know it when you see it - that is a top notch horror film "money shot".

At just over 70 minutes, Simpson doesn't waste too much time building characters or adding subplots - but I'm not sure that's necessary at all here.  All of the main cast members do their jobs well, which is especially impressive when I learned that all four of the female leads - Nelli Scarlet, Karli Madden, Kate Watts and Kyrie Capri - have this film as their first professional credit.  Each of the girls seem at home in the film, and play well off of the more seasoned Norman Yemm, an old man who does a good job as the film's "Crazy Ralph".

I didn't really need to say anything I did in the last few paragraphs - I suppose it was nice of me to confirm the details of the film - because I summed El Monstro Del Mar up perfectly in the first sentence of this review.  It's a lot of fun.  It's not high art, it won't be mistaken for a Hollywood production, and it's barely long enough to even be called a movie - but it's exactly what the advertising says it is.  If you're looking for a deeply terrifying film or a horror movie that comments on life or society or anything else you probably aren't looking for El Monstro Del Mar.  If you want to sit back and grin at a silly bit of carnage for just over an hour, then you'll probably have just as much fun as I did - if not more - with El Monstro Del Mar.

El Monstro Del Mar will be released on DVD by Breaking Glass Pictures on February 28th, and the disc looks to be packed with extras (there are even a couple of short films, one of which has the eye-catching title ACID SPIDERS!).  For more info on the film before then, make sure to check out the official site or the Facebook page, and of course check out the trailer below.

Midnight Movie of the Week #109 - Turbulence

If there was an Over-Actors Hall of Fame, I'm pretty certain it would be ruled by the man who headlined the last two Midnight Movies of the Week: the cultural treasure known simply as "The Shat".  But I'm also pretty sure that, somewhere in that hammy hall, you'd find an image or video clip or holographic rendering (I think holographic rendering would definitely be the coolest option, but science has to make it happen first!) of Ray Liotta as he appears in Turbulence.

The film comes straight from the "I was 16 when this movie came out and thought it looked soooooooooooo good because that guy was in Goodfellas and that gal that married Jim Carrey is really cute" section of the mental video store curated by The Mike, which actually means that the film pretty much sucks.  But there's still something kind of amazing about it when I look at it today....even though I know it sucks.

Liotta stars as Ryan Weaver, incarcerated for raping and killing a bunch of women after a corrupt cop (played by noted gruff dude Hector Elizondo) plants evidence in his possession.  He, of course, needs to be flown across the country, which means he's put on a plane with two guards, who are accompanying another prisoner transport (Brendan Gleeson sporting a horrible accent that I think is supposed to be Texan).  You would think 4 cops could take care of two shackled killers on a plane...but you'd be wrong.  Gleeson's Stubbs gets violent in the restroom, setting a killing spree in motion that momentarily ends with Weaver shooting him dead.

Through this point in the film, Liotta's Weaver is a relatively charming fella - but it's clear that he's a little off.  He asks personal questions, talks awkwardly about the in flight movie, It's a Wonderful Life (like many action movies of the late '80s-mid '90s, the movie just happens to be set around Christmas), and pretends to be an all-around charmer.  The object of his mid-air affection is a flight attendant played by Lauren Holly, despite the fact she seems to have never eaten a sandwich in her life and has the bone structure of something Harryhausen did for Jason and the Argonauts.  (And yet, when I was 16, I thought that was "cute" - foolish mortal Mike.)

Anyone who saw the "More Human Than Human" flavored trailer for the film when it was approaching theaters (check it out below if you haven't) can pretty much tell how the final act plays out.  Weaver is NOT, surprisingly, a nice guy, and suddenly everyone on the plane is pretty much dead and all that's left is the battle of wits between killer and stewardess.  It's not much of a battle - the final act is surprisingly devoid of action once the one-on-one matchup begins - which, along with the awful acting (Holly's chances to be a leading lady in Hollywood ended almost as soon as the film premiered), is part of the reason Turbulence crashed and burned at the box office in early January of 1997. 

Everything else aside, Turbulence is watchable - and still endearing in that "I was 16 and I know I should have known better but it was so fun" way - because of Liotta's psychopathic performance.  His one-liners range from overbearing - like when he peeks through an axe hole like Jack Torrance and growls "say your prayers!" - to dry and cynical - like when he laments his battle with the flight attendant by moaning "I'm never flying this airline again!" at himself.  And there's even his manic rendition of It's a Wonderful Life's Buffalo Gals, which precedes his attempts to get up close and personal with Holly by asking her questions about her favorite movie (Gone With the Wind) and her favorite book (also Gone With the Wind) and when she first had sex. 

 The character is all over the psychopathic map - not schizophrenic, but incredibly unbalanced - and Liotta seems to lap up every chance he has to turn the character in a different direction.  (Also, I can't help thinking that Liotta's huge grin and his haircut and even his rough face would have made a great Joker for a Batman film back in the day.  But hey, that's just me.)

Turbulence is a far cry from being as awesome as other "plane under siege" movies that opened around it:  Executive Decision came out about 8 months earlier, Con Air happened 6 months later.  Heck, the film might even be the antithesis of another MMOTW pick, Wes Craven's Red Eye - which empowers a good actress to act against a more controlled psycho killer.  But, like Weaver tells his captive after admitting that he hates Gone With the Wind, it's all subjective.  Turbulence is a poorly made film that lacks action and features a dull female lead - but it's still got a special place in my heart thanks to Liotta's wicked turn.  He makes an otherwise awful movie a better kind of awful...and tonight I feel like that's a good thing. 

FMWL Indie Spotlight - Some Guy Who Kills People

(2011, Dir. by Jack Perez.)

It's time for us to talk about another one of those movies that will turn you and your expectations upside down and shake you like a Yahtzee tumbler.  The film? Some Guy Who Kills People.  That's a pretty simple title.  Sounds like your average horror movie, right? WRONG.

In fact, Some Guy Who Kills People has more in common with a film like Rushmore than it does with a film like Saw.  The film follows Ken Boyd, a 34 year old man who's just been released from a mental institution - or, as he calls it, a loony bin.  The film establishes quickly that there are many factors that led to Ken's institutionalization, but focuses primarily on one instance of bullying that evolved into torture, a scene that still haunts the rehabilitated ice cream vendor.

Ken is played by Kevin Corrigan, who's been bouncing around big budget and indie films since the early '90s, a recognizable face who has never quite been as personable as he is here.  Sure, he's playing a character who is deeply disturbed, but it's incredibly easy for the viewer to relate with the man, particularly in the current social climate which condemns bullying as a cardinal sin.  Most of us have dealt with bullies at some point in our life - aggressors who truly seem to be one-dimensional pains in our collective asses - so we can feel part of what Ken is going through as he tries to keep his life in order despite the troubles he deals with every day. 

When Ken's life isn't filled with the pain of his past it is filled with the awkwardness of his daily routine.  His estranged 11 year old daughter (Ariel Gade, of the American remake of Dark Water) walks into his life with desires to reconnect, while his mother (horror legend Karen Black) has a relationship with the Sheriff (Barry Bostwick) and he starts to see a woman himself (Shaun of the Dead's Lucy Davis).  This is the stuff of post-Y2K independent drama, except for the fact that some guy is killing people.

While the film offers plenty of character development and a few gruesome murders, everything hinges on Corrigan's marvelous performance in the lead.  The actor gives a simple performance as the everyman lead character, and makes it incredibly easy for viewers to relate to the lead character.  His uneasy performance offers a lot of laughs, and - most importantly - they're the good kind of laughs that come when the viewer recognizes that the jokes are focusing on some good old fashioned human truths.  No, there's not always a guy running around killing people in reality, but people who struggle with their lack of direction in life and their ability to be a father and all that stuff is incredibly real.  Corrigan and Wade do a fantastic job of creating two incredibly real characters, which gives a lot of power to the film.

In the meantime, the murderous side of the story features some more blatant comedy, mostly thanks to the bitter performance by Black as the mother/grandmother who has to deal with everything around her and Bostwick's hammy turn as the Sheriff.  Bostwick provides plenty of comic relief as the bumbling lawman, but late in the film he seems to hold the key to building power in the final act.  In fact, it was one of his revelations during an interrogation scene late in the film that had me clapping my hands and nodding my head, because it was then that I realized just how well Some Guy Who Kills People really understands what it's doing.

And that's what makes Some Guy Who Kills People one of the best movies I've seen in a long time.  The film - as scripted by Ryan Levin, who cut his teeth on Scrubs, and as directed by Jack Perez, whose last "big" movie was Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus - really gets it.  It gets what makes a victim of bullying so mad.  It gets what goes on inside the mind of someone who can't deal with the difficulties in their life, and who has to find a way to deal with these issues.

Of course, it might not "get it" in the way you expect it too, and the final act just might surprise you.  And that just adds to why I love the heck out of Some Guy Who Kills People.  It's a truly one of a kind indie horror film that doubles as a commentary on how we all deal with those who keep us down in our life.  It sounds like I'm condoning violence here, which is not my intention.  Unfortunately, I can't really explain just what happens to take Some Guy Who Kills - which was already an interesting character study and a wonderful dark comedy - to the next level in the final act.

But the point is that you need to find a way to see Some Guy Who Kills People. I'm running out of ways to say it, but it's been the only thing going through my head all day.  This movie...it really rules, people.  I absolutely can not wait to see where the film goes from here.

If you want to keep up with the film, make sure you head on over to the official site, which is full of links to Twitter and Facebook and a trailer and all that good stuff.  And if you don't want to keep up with the film at this point....well, then I obviously suck at my job here.  Because I'm really serious when I say this is an incredible piece of genre-bending cinematic awesomeness.  Just see it already.

The Grey

(2012, Dir. by Joe Carnahan.)

Almost three years to the day after Taken opened in the US and made us all turn our heads in surprise, Liam Neeson is still laying claim to his new found role as a bonafide action hero.  Though his 60th birthday is coming up this summer, Neeson has re-established himself as a star through a series of tough guy roles, a trend that continued with this weekend's release of The Grey.

Re-uniting Neeson with The A-Team director, Joe Carnahan, The Grey lets Neeson take charge as a hired gun whose job is to eliminate wolves at an Alaskan outpost.  That job lasts for about two scenes - long enough to establish via voice over and a shot of him preparing to kill himself - setting up the character's depressed mental state just before he's involved in a freak plane explosion/crash that leaves him and a handful of less hero-esque survivors stranded in the middle of a frozen wasteland.

The biggest problem that Neeson and his followers have to deal with? Wolves, naturally.  Many will argue about the use of wolves in the film - some think the director and his crew were abusive toward animals, some think it's silly to assume that wolves would hunt a pack of humans who stand up to them repeatedly - but there are wolves in the movie nonetheless.  I'm not an animalologist or a crazy PETA person (You guys: MEAT TASTES AWESOME!), so I'm not gonna comment on any of those speculations.  I'll just say that the wolves look incredibly real and are pretty intimidating foes, and they serve their purpose as a plot device in Carnahan's film.

You see, the movie isn't about the wolves.  It's about the men and their struggle to survive.  You're probably groaning at how cliche that comment is, and you have every right to - most every movie ever made is about the characters' struggle, and a focused "survival" movie like this is nothing new.  The most interesting thing about the struggle is the mental state of Neeson's character, whose depression at times makes the viewer wonder if he's a liability to the others on this journey. 

The film gets a little heavy handed at times - I particularly groaned at a scene in which Neeson stands up to a challenge from a follower right after the group hears Neeson explain the idea of "Alpha and Omega" wolves to the men - but there are some really interesting moments peppered throughout the film.  Moments when the characters reflect upon what they have to live for really hit home, and the opposing viewpoints of Neeson's jaded commentary help strengthen the story.  The supporting performances are serviceable, most notably veteran character actor Dermot Mulroney in an almost unrecognizable role as one of the men, and his comments throughout the journey are a welcome addition to the film. 

(The most interesting thing I learned after reading about the film today was that the producers advertised the film directly to Christian viewers, which boggles my mind when I consider the main character's vocal disdain toward religion throughout the film.  I'd absolutely love to see the 'film companion' that was distributed to religious groups, because I seriously can't fathom what Carnahan and his producers intended to say to Christians.)

The tone of the film is most endearing to me when I look at the director, Carnahan, whose bombastic last two films (Smokin' Aces and The A-Team) lacked the focus on character that was present in his breathtaking debut film, Narc.  The fact that I'm talking about the film's attempts to carry a deeper message and to be a character-driven action film is a huge improvement on those fun-but-pointless films.  I'm just not sure I think everything about The Grey works.  The proceedings become pretty repetitive in the second act - deal with attack, philosophize, argue, repeat - and the momentum that the director and the star bring to the film kind of stalls out at times. I'm usually the last person to use the dreaded "boring" word about a film, but I can't deny that The Grey had me on the edge of sleep a few times.

In the end, I'm really not sure what I think about The Grey.  Some of what it offers is incredibly effective, and some of it had me tired and ready for more.  It's definitely not a movie for the masses like Taken was three years ago, and an ambiguous ending (Make sure you stay till after the credits!) will probably divide audiences too.  I liked the ending, I just wasn't wild about the path the film took to get there.  Is it a good film? For the most part, yes.  But I'm not ready to proclaim it a must-see addition to the new year just yet.  Perhaps you'll disagree.

The Mike's Top 11 Alien Invasion Films of 1950-2000

When my good buddy Russ of Dead End Drive-In asked me to participate in his Alien Invasion Weekend, I didn't even have to think about my response.  Russ asked me to cover some of my favorite alien invasion flicks made before the year 2000 (because we all know Y2K ended civilization back then, of course), and I did what I do: I made a list.

I'm being kind of picky on semantics here, and a couple of my very favorite sci-fi films ever - The Day the Earth Stood Still and Close Encounters of the Third Kind - are getting the shaft due to this.  Look, Gort wasn't here to take us out, he was just forced to get a little angry.  And those Close Encounters things? Heck, they were just curious.  Yes, these might be two of my five favorite sci-fi films, but I'm looking for good old fashioned destructive invaders here.

Also, I cheated several times on this list.  There are a few cases once in a while - though most horror fans won't believe me - where both original films and their remakes were awesome.  And I've lumped them together here so I can cover more of my favorite invasion flicks.  You like more awesome, don't you?

Honorable Mentions? Yeah, we got some honorable mentions for you.

Honorable Mention: War of the Worlds (1953), Earth vs. The Flying Saucers (1956), Mars Needs Women (1967), Superman II (1980), Night of the Creeps (1986), Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988), Independence Day (1996), The Faculty (1998)

Some notes on those Honorable Mentions:

• A lot of people will probably balk at the exclusion of War of the Worlds, Earth vs. The Flying Saucers, and Independence Day, which have a lot of great publicity and a lot of great special effects for their eras.  While each film features a pretty widespread invasion, I got a few more cerebral picks ahead of them. (And a couple that are much dumber too.)
• Sure, any Superman film could technically be an Alien Invasion film, but General Zod and his awkward friends are pretty much the best kind of invaders.  I won't quite kneel, but I'll give him some props.
• YOU GUYS! The Faculty is seriously underrated. There, I said it.

Now, let's see that list!

Number 11 - Bloodsuckers from Outer Space (1984)

Bloodsuckers from Outer Space is certainly one of those movies that is so bad that it's....bad.  But at the same time it's kind of not.  Heck,  the IMDB voters - who are generally the cruelest and most genre unfriendly people on our planet - even have given it a 5.2 out of ten rating.  A 5.2 on IMDB for a movie with these production values is like a Nobel Peace Prize for someone with Hitler's racial beliefs.  Anyway, Bloodsuckers from Outer Space is terribly silly, but it's got that odd feeling like this whole small town was in on the joke and everyone chipped in and made this goofy flick a ton of fun. So it's kind of awesome.

Number 10 - Not of this Earth (1957, 1988)

Speaking of silly, you won't find two filmmakers who are more open to cheese than Roger Corman and Jim Wynorski.  And the story behind Not of this Earth, featuring a nurse who works for an odd character who turns out to be an emissary from a distant land (and I don't mean Kansas), lends itself to their kind of cheese.  The former film is a black and white drive-in classic led by Paul "Marlboro Man" Birch, the latter is full of comedic turns and led by former porn star Traci Lords.  Both films are charming enough to hit this list, in their own ways.

Number 9 - The Arrival (1996)

It's probably not a good idea to put a Charlie Sheen film this close to one starring a porn star, but I'm gonna risk it.  The Arrival arrived (oof, that stung) early in the Summer of 1996 - just before Independence Day was released to much hype - and kind of fell on deaf ears throughout the world.  But director David Twohy's film is a pretty smart sci-fi chiller, with Sheen's Zane Zaminski (major bonus points for cool character name!) uncovering a secret signal and then battling wits with a dastardly Ron Silver (and you all should know just how much The Mike loves Ron Silver - it's a lot).  The action and the effects that big budget sci-fi flicks are known for aren't here, but I'll take it over its much bigger 1996 counterpart any day of the week.

Number 8 - The Hidden (1987)

I've written about The Hidden before, but it bears repeating that this might be the '80s coolest sci-fi flick.  The action packed story follows a creature that inhabits human bodies and gets a little silly when the special effects come into play, but the brisk pace keeps the film going so fast that you barely notice anything amiss.  The Hidden also capitalizes on political concerns of the '80s and seems to throw a huge middle finger at the culture of the time, particularly in ritzy Los Angeles. I can dig it.

Number 7 - Men in Black (1997)

The legendary guardians against all kinds of alien invasiony nonsense take form in Barry Sonnenfeld's summer blockbuster, and face off with a one alien wrecking crew: "The Bug", portrayed in human form by Vincent D'Onofrio.  Sure, the invasion is a secondary part of the film to Will Smith's evolution from cool dude to wise and cool dude, but it's still one of the most charming sci-fi comedies out there.  And Tommy Lee Jones' straight man opposite utter chaos is always welcome.

Number 6 - Invaders from Mars (1953, 1986)

One of the first invasion films to make a connection to the Cold War and communism, the original Invaders from Mars comes to the viewer from the perspective of a young boy who witnesses an invasion. The invasion that follows has the required amount of military involvement and parent manipulation, which helps the film overcome some problems in acting and direction.  Tobe Hooper's 1986 remake uses more comedy and more special effects, and is a good time-passer.

Number 5 - The Blob (1958)

Did you really think I wasn't gonna mention The Blob?  Sure, his (Or is it a her? Do Blobs even have genders? Are there more than one Blob? We never really know!) invasion was stopped pretty quickly by really old teenagers, but he wins plenty of style points for being one of the few amorphous invaders in film history.  And I love The Blob, so it's on the list.  NEXT.

Number 4 - Predator (1987)

I'm sure he wasn't voted "Most Likely to Blow Himself Up on Another Planet Because of an Austrian Lunkhead" when he graduated his planet's equivalent of high school, which makes the ill-fated invasion by the Predator all the more sad.  But his movie is still pretty amazing, so I'm willing to give some credit to the Predator for being the baddest humanoid one-man invasion crew ever.  He couldn't have predicted that he was going to run into Schwarzenegger, Weathers, and the rest of the bad-asses, and we can't hold that against him.

Number 3 - The Thing From Another World/The Thing (1951, 1982)

I'm probably undervaluing The Thing here, mostly because it wins almost every time I make a list.  Both versions of this story vary greatly, and both represent different kinds of invaders.  Much like the last two films, the invaders are slowed by factors outside their control - in these cases, location.  The original Thing gets bonus points for basically birthing the "watch the skies" craze of the '50s, while the remake gets bonus points for just being really awesome.

Number 2 - They Live (1988)

What if the invasion is already here?  That's the question asked - and answered by a nameless blue-collar worker - in They Live, which has has long been one of my favorite movies to talk about.  Like The Hidden, we get a look at how greed can be involved in an '80s Los Angeles invasion, but this time it's human greed taking the lead instead of alien greed.  I've spent a lot of words on how important I think They Live is before, so I'm just gonna let it tell its own story this time around.

Number 1 - Invasion of Body Snatchers/Body Snatchers (1956, 1978, 1993)

First things first - I'm not as wild about the '78 remake as everyone else is.  Yes, Sutherland and Nimoy.  No, it's not as scary as people say and the ending's kind of dumb.  And it's way too long.  It's good. It's not great.

That said, the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers is the definitive sci-fi paranoia epic.  From Kevin McCarthy's howling lead performance to the cool pod people effects, there's plenty to love about the movie that's spawned three remakes.  My favorite of those, as evidenced above, is Abel Ferrara's 1993 Body Snatchers. With a script by horror maestros Stuart Gordon and Larry Cohen, an ominous army base setting, and wonderful performances by the Gabrielle Anwar, Meg Tilly, and Forest Whitaker.

Though the flying saucers and little green men get the most headlines, it's the invaders that we can't easily see that provide the most chills and thrills for viewers.  Siegel knew that, and the story he created lives on - in many different tellings (though it's best we just don't mention The Invasion, isn't it?) - as my favorite alien invasion.

Except for maybe this one....

Midnight Movie of the Week #108 - The Devil's Rain

William Shatner's back for a second week in the Midnight Movie of the Week spotlight, but this time he's just a small reason I'm talking about a kooky '70s desert-based horror.  This week we're talking about The Devil's Rain, which allows one of my all-time favorite actors (and possibly one of my all-time favorite people, even though I've never met him) to lead a Satanic cult through a demented plot.

That actor is the unmistakable Ernest Borgnine, who gained my love through roles like the lead character in the Oscar winning romance Marty and the memorable Cabbie from Escape from New York.  But The Devil's Rain lets him - under the "techinical" guidance of real-world Satanist cult leader Anton LaVey - take on a heavy role as the high priest of a dangerous church.  His character, Corbis, turns out to be more than 200 years old, and is still leading in his attempts to get revenge on a family that once betrayed him.

The first antagonist from that family - at least that is shown in the film, which means that nothing too memorable must have happened in the last 200 years of him torturing the family - is Mark Preston, played by The Shat.  We meet him as the film opens, and are quickly made to know that Corbis has some kind of power over his family.  How do we know that? Well, we know that because Mark's dad's face melts.

The result is a showdown in the desert between Borgnine's Corbis and Shatner's Mark, which the satanist dubs "a battle of faith".  Using plenty of conjurer's tricks, Corbis defeats and enslaves Shatner, which leads to two things.  In the film, it leads to Tom Skerritt and his attractive young wife (Joan Prather) teaming up with an expert (Eddie Albert) to try and get to the bottom of things and stop Corbis' reign.  In the world of horror, Shatner's capture leads to him wearing a cheesy looking mask....the same mask that would be painted white and become the face of Michael Myers three years later.

The rest of the eighty-six minute film - whose plot moves swiftly and carelessly and often doesn't make a lot of sense - focuses on the trio of Skerritt, Prather, and Albert and their attempts to stop Corbis, while Corbis performs ceremonies on Shatner and a young John Travolta and turns into a horned demon.  Certain critics have stated that The Devil's Rain doesn't really have enough material in it to be a full feature film, and they're probably right - especially when you get to the end of the film and realize that the climax happens with about 12 minutes left and the rest of the film is the chaotic aftermath.

The titular Devil's Rain is a glass jar/crystal ball lookin' thing that holds the souls of Corbis' slaves, and it plays heavily into the film's final act.  At this point in the proceedings we know that everything the film offers is pretty ridiculous - as a Christian, there's a voice inside me that says "What did you expect from a movie whose technical consultant invented a Satan religion?"- but there's a kitschy charm throughout the film thanks to the cast.  Director Robert Fuest was no stranger to campy cult flicks - he'd previously directed both Dr. Phibes films with Vincent Price - so he handles things admirably when you consider the script. (I also can't believe that it took three people to write this thing.)  Unfortunately, the film's poor reception from critics and failures at the box office pretty much ended Fuest's genre feature career.

It sounds like I'm dissing The Devil's Rain a lot here, and that certainly wasn't my intention when I started typing this.  You see, despite all its silly flaws, there's certainly a one-of-a-kind charm to Fuest's film.  I attribute much of that to Borgnine, who buys in to the role and makes Corbis a menace throughout the film, and the rest of the cast, and the director's willingness to let things spiral out of control as the film goes on.  The effects might not hold up - those masks on the members of Corbis' congregation do the film no favors - and the plot may be lacking, but fans of Satanic cinema will find some great images and fun performances throughout this one.

I've just experienced The Devil's Rain for the first time this week, so the fact that I'm sitting here and talking about it right now is a pretty strong testament regarding the film.  I'm willing to give a lot of its more obvious shortcomings a pass.  The short run-time ensures that the film doesn't overstay its welcome, and the odd chain of events that we see through the film is certainly unique and interesting.  And it has Borgnine.  And that's pretty much enough to keep me interested in checking out The Devil's Rain again when I'm craving some cheesy '70s satanism and some diabolical Borgnine goodness.

The Woman

(2011, Dir. by Lucky McKee.)

Trying to decide which character in The Woman is most terrifying is like trying to decide which flavor of mayonnaise you want to eat.  It's a trick question, because no sane person actually wants to eat mayonnaise...especially if it comes in different flavors that still will taste like mayonnaise.  The point is that the central conflict of The Woman is one of those situations where no one really wins, everyone really suffers, and it all comes together to form one of the most interesting horror films in years.

Over the past few years, I've occasionally wondered what was up with director Lucky McKee - who wowed me way back in 2002 with the wonderful human horror film May - who seemed to have fallen into a slump after that initial horror hit.  But The Woman - which he co-wrote with author Jack Ketchum, who seems to specialize in sadism and real-world torture - is a dramatic statement that the director still has a lot to offer film fans from all walks of life.

Pollyanna McIntosh is featured as the title character, a cannibalistic woman of the forest who is captured and "trained" by a rural family.  McIntosh is reprising a role that she originated in a less publicized and poorly-reviewed Ketchum adaptation, entitled Offspring, but it's easy to see who and what she is even if you don't know that. (I found out this was a sequel about 30 minutes into the film, and didn't consider that a drawback to this film at all.) The actress physically transforms into the terrifying character, and it's pretty near impossible for the viewer to recognize her supermodel-esque stature as she writhes through the film as the monstrous man-eater.  Silent and demonic isn't a new task for a horror antagonist, but McIntosh's woman is one of the more unique and unsettling visions I've seen in a long, long time.

I almost stopped myself when I called McIntosh the antagonist a moment ago, because - as I mentioned at the top of this review - those who oppose her are terrifying in their own way.  The main oppressor is the patriarch of the family played by Sean Bridgers, a lanky actor who seems kind of goofy by Hollywood standards and is kind of a mixture of Will Ferrell and Anthony Perkins.  Bridgers is a demanding father who rules through passive means (when he's not getting physical with his kids, wife, and captive), and the progression from kind-of-a-dick to full-fledged sociopath that his character makes is handled perfectly throughout the film.  Bridgers is such a natural in the role that I'd imagine he's one of those people who would creep me out if I ran into him on the street, even though I know he's just an actor.

(In the same vein as that last comment, I'd like to point out that I'd also never, ever, no matter how supermodel she looks, put anything near McIntosh's mouth.  Even though I know she's just an actor too.)

The father's family are made up of several scared and confused young folks, led by May star Angela Bettis as his wife and Lauren Ashley Carter and Zach Rand as their elder children.  Bettis gives a frail performance as the wife, who is the victim of a few of his assaults, while the children represent opposite ends of the spectrum of abuse.  When the father lets them all know that this beast of a woman is trapped on their property, we get to witness the varied reactions of his family - and how they deal with that knowledge in their own ways sells the film's perspective quite well.

With a terrifying physical specimen on one end of the story and an uncontrollable male with no conscience on the other, the questions that are raised by The Woman become more complex and more thought-provoking as the film goes on.  There are several details - specifically in the final act - that are left to the viewer to interpret in their own ways.  This will probably confuse and bewilder some viewers, and I admit that I had to take pause and wonder if I missed something along the way at a couple of moments, but the final conflicts of the film speak their own language to the viewer.  There's plenty of blood and guts as the arrangement between the family and the woman finally is shaken up, and it all leads to a satisfying, if not open-ended, conclusion.

When I put the events of the film together in retrospect - and I had to "sleep on it" to really get everything straight in my head - The Woman stands up as one of the more fascinating films I've seen in a long time.  There's so much said about human cruelty and nature vs. nurture and even gender roles - perhaps my first reaction to the film was to feel like my own gender has never done anything right for our female counterparts - in The Woman, and almost all of it is handled with care by Ketchum and McKee.

The Woman is surely not a popcorn horror film that viewers will want to consume often, but I didn't think it was as heavy as some of Ketchum's other works (I'm still debating whether I'll ever feel safe to watch The Girl Next Door again) and it's pretty accessible for horror fans of all types.  I can't recommend it enough.

(Oh, the trailer just reminded me of one complaint that's pretty minor.  I wasn't wild about the soundtrack.  I like that the film doesn't have your average horror movie score with all the pulsating and screaming, but the indie rock/emo thing bugged me after a while.  I'm not sure what I'd have done differently, but at times I was concerned the film was trying to dictate my emotions via music, and it took away from the film at times. 

But, that doesn't change the fact that this is a must-see horror film. So see it!)

The Last Circus (or, Balada Triste de Trompeta)

(2010, Dir. by Alex de la Iglesia.)

Any reference to horror's early years - the times when Lon Chaney ruled the world and led to the era of Karloff and Lugosi - is welcome in Mike's world, but I didn't really expect a connection between these horror icons and The Last Circus, which was promoted as a bombastic onslaught of violence that might have been the Spanish answer to violent filmmakers like Quentin Tarantino.  In fact, there are some loose parallels between this film and Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds, both in theme and in execution, though I'm not entirely sure the similar tone was intentional.

The fact that I'm talking about Chaney and Karloff and Tarantino while talking about a flick I didn't really care to see speaks volumes about how surprised I was to find myself caught up in The Last Circus - or, as the Spanish title says, A Sad Trumpet Ballad - as it unfolded before me.  I expected it to be a film about sadistic disfigured clowns who run around with high-powered weapons - and, for the most part, it is - but that literal Spanish title is a lot more telling than the American advertisements would have you believe.

Director Alex de la Iglesias may not directly reference his contemporaries, but the opening credit montage - a montage of images that follows the events of the twentieth century and focuses heavily on war imagery - spends several moments featuring Lon Chaney, Boris Karloff and even Charles B. Middleton (and his portrayal of the diabolical Ming the Merciless in the initial Flash Gordon serials).  This isn't just a cute homage, it's a warning of things to come, because the director's story clearly draws from the tortured-soul-turned-monster themes that filled early horror films.

The plot follows the doomed existence of Javier, the son of a clown who is destined to be a "sad clown" after witnessing his father's involvement in World War II.  The father leads the first action-packed sequence - one of the countless moments in the film which feature dudes in clown makeup killing efficiently - before being imprisoned and eventually killed by a vicious general.  Before his death, he gets a chance to remind his son of his fate and the one thing that can save him - revenge.

Javier grows up and accepts his circus job as sad clown - destined to be the butt of all jokes and the recipient of much abuse - and meets the two people who seal his tortured fate.  One is the funny clown he works for - an abusive and violent drunk named Sergio - and the other is that clown's beautiful girlfriend, the circus' trapeze artist named Natalia.  Despite their vast differences, Natalia quickly becomes interested in the portly sad clown - because he's the one person who stands up to Sergio when he tells a dead baby joke.  Unfortunately, Natalia is still interested in Sergio too, due to his violent and sexual nature, which creates the conflict that carries the film.

Throughout the film, all three characters are victims in countless ways.  Both clowns end up with facial disfigurements and mental maladies, while Natalia is stuck in the middle to witness their madness.  All three characters are drawn really well, and the actors that portray them - Carlos Areces as Javier, Antonio de la Torre as Sergio, and Carolina Bang (who is a) incredibly stunning and b) despite her name, NOT a porn star) as Natalia - do a fantastic job of physically throwing themselves into the film.  The disconnect between the timid sad clown and the unhinged funny clown is tested as Javier becomes increasingly demented, but continues to be a key to the film through the impressive cliffhanger of a finale.

The least interesting thing about the film is its violence and carnage - which were one of the main selling points of the film in the first place - but that's not saying the brutality is a distraction from the psychological drama on screen.  These scenes of bloodshed are the ones that will remind American audiences of people like Tarantino or Rob Zombie, but I got a little distracted from the main story through them.  A mid film sequence that brings Javier back into contact with his father's killer seems especially odd as I look back at the film, as this sequence might only be remembered because it blatantly refuses to put clothes on Areces.  It's not a bad sequence in total, but when it's compared to the tragic love triangle that unfolds in the first and third acts it seems like filler.

Tragedy, not brutality, is the key word when it comes to The Last Circus for me.  Sure, you get a huge, ugly clown running around with machine guns and threatening children, but it's the dramatic turns that mimic the earliest days of horror that sold The Last Circus to me.  I'm not sure the end result is really a great film, but I put a lot more thought into this one than I expected to when i saw the first advertisements, and that alone has me excited to experience The Last Circus - or, should I say, A Sad Trumpet Ballad - again.  It's a deviously interesting little film.

Haywire

(2012, Dir. by Steven Soderbergh.)

Steven Soderbergh has been one of Hollywood's most reliable directors throughout his career, with hits like Traffic, Ocean's Eleven, and last year's Contagion to his credit.  But he's also reserved a reputation as a director who loves to experiment with other ideas.  For example, he cast small-town workers as small-town workers in 2005's Bubble, and he cast pornographic actress Sasha Grey to headline his 2009 call girl drama The Girlfriend Experience.  Soderbergh's outside-the-box approach to casting has become a pattern over more than 15 years, which made it less of a surprise when he cast female MMA fighter Gina Carano as the lead in his latest thriller, Haywire.

Carano - who I first knew as "the cute one" from the American Gladiators reboot with Hulk Hogan - headlines the action-packed flick as Mallory Kane, an ex-Marine who works for a "private contractor" and does odd jobs like extracting hostages from Barcelona or investigating a shady businessman in Dublin.  She's surrounded by a cast of powerful Hollywood males - Ewen McGregor, Antonio Banderas, and Michael Douglas as the men in power, Bill Paxton as her concerned father, Michael Fassbender as a British agent, and Channing Tatum as a coworker-turned-opponent - but I really don't think any viewer will leave this film and not realize that this is entirely Carano's film.

You've no doubt seen the plot before - skilled professional is set-up, escapes, seeks to clear name and get vindication - but the script by Lem Dobbs (who wrote one of my favorite Soderbergh flicks, The Limey) and Soderbergh's framing of the action sequences play to the strengths of the star.  That means that Carano is free to use plenty of hand-to-hand combat when faced with danger, throwing adversaries with her own momentum, using the walls as springboards when necessary, and focusing on weakening limbs and immobilizing others to control the fight.  The film isn't as action-packed as the ads would have you believe and some viewers might complain of lapses between action, but I felt Soderbergh balanced the drama of Mallory's plight with more than enough fast-paced fighting and car chases.

Carano is naturally a little green as an actress - I kept thinking that she was overdoing it with facial expressions to denote every thought or concern - but she does a pretty wonderful job when you consider how little acting she's done.  There's a definite Kill Bill vibe to the character, but - unlike Uma Thurman - there's not even a doubt in the viewer's mind that Carano is capable of the things she does on screen.  The way she carries herself in the role goes a long way to making the film work, because you can see her confidence in herself shining through in almost every scene.

Much will be made of the fact that Haywire empowers a female action star - though I love the quote in the film that warns "You shouldn't think of her as a woman.  That would be a mistake" - and rightfully so.  This plays like a tribute to Carano and the abilities that women like her posses.  I can't think of a Hollywood actress who could have jumped into this film and brought the same combination of skill and intensity, which makes the minor quirks in her acting style irrelevant.  Haywire simply could not be what it is without a woman like Carano.

January is generally a dumping ground for movies that studios don't want, so the release of a well-made action thriller from Soderbergh and a Grade A cast is like found gold.  When you look at all the talent that surrounds her - both behind and in front of the camera - it's easy to see that Carano was set up for success here.  Her particular set of skills does a lot of the work for the film, and the polish that's provided by Soderbergh and company ensures that few will be disappointed by her or the film.  Haywire isn't gonna win Soderbergh another Oscar, but it's a completely entertaining action/thriller that signals the potential birth of a star.  If she keeps working with the right people, Carano could be the female action hero that Hollywood's craved for decades.

Midnight Movie of the Week #107 - Kingdom of the Spiders

The epic journey of Rack Hansen is something any man, woman, or child would want to be a part of.  After all, Rack Hansen is a one-of-a-kind cowboy vet, who's not above riding a horse and wearing a pink cowboy shirt and being awesome.  And, when you consider the fact that Rack Hansen is played by none less than William Shatner, you kind of get the idea that there should be a whole series of Rack Hansen films out there. Mostly because his name is Rack Hansen, of course.

Unfortunately, there is only one Rack Hansen film - I pray I'm wrong, but that seems to be the truth - and that film is the 1977 arachna-palooza Kingdom of the Spiders.  The Shat gets his Arizona swagger on alongside one of FMWL's three (imaginary) brides, Tiffany Bolling - who naturally plays a hot arachnologist - in the battle to save a small Arizona community from a seemingly unending wave of tarantulas.  The film is the debut feature by director John "Bud" Cardos, and it's one of those movies that is surprisingly good at what it does if you only consider what it intends to do.

I forgot to mention that the great Woody Strode - who broke the NFL's color barrier and was basically awesome - has a supporting role in the film.

No, Kingdom of the Spiders will never be confused with high art - this is the kind of movie the Criterion collection would pretend to release on April Fool's Day - and it's easy to see the film's flaws.  Y'know, flaws like the fact that tarantula venom actually doesn't do much to humans, yet kills several throughout the film.  Kingdom of the Spiders was also pretty late to the game among animals-gone-wild films of the 1970s, following plenty of films like The Food of the Gods, that covered similar territory.

Except you rarely saw a cow in the back seat of a car in other movies.

I could argue that Kingdom of the Spiders is a far more competent film than something like Food of the Gods, but I'd be missing the point.  The point is that this one has Shatner stomping the crud out of hundreds of real tarantulas.  The animal rights folks would probably have a fit if someone tried to make this movie today, because I'm willing to bet that a lot of "innocent" spiders were harmed and or killed during the making of this film.  Me, I'm OK with the film, because spiders creep me the heck out.  If it has more than 4 legs or less than 2, I kill it - that's my motto.

I don't really need to waste my time discussing what Shatner brings to the film, because the only way to describe a William Shatner performance is by saying he acts like William Shatner.  Bolling is certainly more restrained in this PG feature than she is in her other grindhouse roles (check out all my Tiffany Bolling love here), with her primary purpose in the film being that she reminds us that William Shatner is the man of the film.  She's still a sight to see, and Cardos does what he can to show her in as much undress as the MPAA will allow under a PG rating, but she's not Shatner and she's not the spiders and thus she's not really that important to the film.

As the film builds toward a final act that resembles "trapped in a house" settings like those of The Birds or Night of the Living Dead, we're treated to an increasing amount of Shatner that's sure to satisfy any cheese lover.  Moments like the one when Shatner reaches into a vent and recoils in pain or when he ventures into a cellar only to be blanketed by eight legged critters show off the kind of acting that only the Captain of the Starship Enterprise is capable of.  There are sure to be some laughs had at Shatner's expense - then again, when aren't there laughs had at Shatner's expense? - but this certainly wouldn't be as watchable a film without his thespian talents.

It probably sounds like I'm dissing Kingdom of the Spiders, but I really do love this silly little movie.  Cardos - who would later direct the odd 1979 chiller The Dark (I dig that one too!) and the 1984 Wings Hauser film Mutant  (and I have got to see that!) - keeps the film simple but never seems to be in over his head as a director.  When I compared the film to The Birds or NOTLD earlier I certainly didn't mean to compare this director to Hitchcock or Romero, but Cardos is more than capable of keeping the film moving and making the story seem more pulpy than trashy.  Though some of the scenes where the spiders meet the main cast seem a bit off - a lot of times the tarantulas don't follow direction and run AWAY from their "victims" - there are some fantastic scenes in which the spiders roam through the small town and crawl all over cast members and extras.

The film's willingness to use real spiders is sure to give anyone with even the slightest case of arachnaphobia some chills, and the director and his talented (in their own ways) stars keep Kingdom of the Spiders feeling like more than just another cheesy animal attack film.  It's hard to really explain why - maybe it's just that nerds like me put Shatner on one heckuva pedestal - but Kingdom of the Spiders is greater than the sum of its parts.  And now that Shout Factory has rescued it from the public domain and produced a fantastic DVD transfer of the film - please note that the DVD cover implies that a torch comes out of Mr. Shatner's crotch, which sadly does not really happen - there's nothing that should keep any of us from boldly visiting this Kingdom when we need a dose of late '70s cheese.

 Oh, and I can't finish this review without referencing the INCREDIBLY AWKWARD quasi-romantic relationship between Rack Hansen (I seriously haven't said Rack Hansen enough tonight) and the widow of his brother, who totally wants a dose of Rack.  That's a problem when you consider the fact that Tiffany Bolling is also in the movie, so let's just say that the film wraps up this bit of awkwardness relatively early in the film's plot.  But that doesn't make the love triangle any less awkward.

 Well done, Rack Hansen. Well done.